I should also note that I've always been told to never try anything new on race day. Of course my impulsive nature often gets in the way of common sense so I'm competing on a new bike, new pedals (arrived yesterday), and new shoes. Fortunately I survived the first day without any major injuries or pain. I'm hoping to visit Chris at Racer Racer this week for an actual fitting.
Stage 1 - Elements of Style and The Long Scream (1 hr 10 mins)
I was nervous starting this stage as I had an emergency Rubber Glove session to establish my FTP on Bean the bike a few days ago and had a hard 6 mile run yesterday. Needless to say, my legs were shot before I even started.
The Elements of Style is one of the easier videos and served as a nice warm up for The Long Scream. It focuses on various pedaling drills to hone technique. I did well, except I don't seem to be able to get out of the saddle correctly. The video instructs you to engage your glutes for power when standing but my quads immediately start to burn and I have to sit back down after 10-15 seconds. I thought I might be in trouble during the next video when my legs started to burn towards the end of what is supposed to be no more than a warm up.
The Long Scream... how to even begin to describe it? You start with a brief 3 or 4 minute "warm up" and then jump right into a 30 minute time trial that never seems to let up. It is far and away the hardest thing I've done yet on a bike. I never thought I would be so happy to see a 5 second "break" while the riders ahead of me rounded a curve. Here's the thought process during this video:
5 minutes in - "Hmmm... starting to feel my legs already and I'm barely out of the warm up, that's probably not good"
10 minutes in - "That 5 second rest was awesome"
15 minutes in - "Go back to that girl! I like the enemy!"
20 minutes in - "Go faster? WTF? Is that even possible"
30 minutes in - (between panting breaths) "Can't stop now, only 3 minutes to go"
33 minutes in (final sprint) "blalakfjsdlifjowiejofiajflwiejoaw"
34 minutes in - "Holy schnikeys! I did it"
Stage 2 - Blender (1 hr 40 mins)
First off, I may have underestimated the difficulty of the Tour of Sufferlandria. My wife just rolls her eyes when I tell her things like this as she's come to expect my idiocy. I kept up with my normal workload this week, so no taper, plus the added Rubber Glove session to test the new bike and an unplanned swim session last night to test my new (to me) Garmin 910. This brought my training volume from a little over 6 hours last week to over 8.5 this week. That's a significant jump considering most of it was at high intensity. I think I'll email my coach after I write this and let him know that we need to back off the running next week. I'm plan on swimming Monday and Wednesday with my swim group but will limit the running to a few morning sessions on non-swim days. This will leave the evening session to the Tour of Sufferlandria.
Now, onto stage 2! My first thought after finishing the video was that the stupid hamster and the Sufferlandrian Time Machine can suck it! It may not have been as physically and mentally draining as The Long Scream yesterday, but it was significantly longer and featured plenty of "I don't know if I can keep this up" inner monologues. My heart rate jumped into the 130-150 range during the warm-up so I knew I was in trouble. I spent almost 40% of my time at VO2 max and another 27% at threshold... that's a lot of work! The stage begins with some longer road racing sessions starting below threshold and getting progressively worse. I find these near threshold to above paces for an extended period of time more difficult to maintain than what happens next, the infamous pain shakes. I struggled to find my gearing on a few of the higher intervals but managed to stay pretty close to the target wattage. The stage ends with three 4 minute sessions at threshold, which are tough, but manageable. I simply put my head down and try to zone out while channeling my inner Jens Voigt, SHUT UP LEGS!
I wasn't sure how to fuel for an event like this so I erred on the side of caution. I woke up a few hours early and had a big breakfast of coffee, scrambled eggs and spinach, 2 pieces of bacon, and rice cakes with almond butter with bananas. I rarely eat sugar but use hard rides like this as an excuse to have one of my favorite treats, Jelly Beans. In this case they are called "Sports Beans", so that makes them athletic. I had one pack about 15 minutes before I started and another pack every 35-40 minutes. This seemed to work as I never bonked, despite my legs being absolutely shot.
It seems that enjoying suffering seems to be unique to cyclists (and possibly endurance athletes in general). My friends and family who do not ride think I'm nuts for enjoying something like this, and they may have a point. There's a lot to be said for pushing yourself beyond what you think is possible and seeing what you're made of. There were many times throughout this stage when I couldn't imagine finishing but I did my best to ignore my inner pessimist (no matter how loud he is) and pulled through only to emerge better and stronger. Now it's time for food and recovery. I might try an ice bath as I've heard they help, though it's not something I'm looking forward to.
Stage 3 - Fight Club (1 hour)
I have to admit, I definitely underestimated the Tour. It seemed like a fun thing to do, something that would be difficult but manageable. Unfortunately I was wrong.
My head is full of amazing and insightful thoughts while riding the tour. Unfortunately by the time I finish I'm a quivering mess, huddled on the floor in the fetal position, trying to figure out how best to climb the stairs to get back to my family who either ignore my pleas for help or stand at the top of the stairs and laugh at me. Fight Club was no different, and probably the worst/best yet. It consists of a series of time trial efforts followed immediately by some rough climbing. To make things even more fun they add in random attacks throughout the intervals. I'm not ashamed to say that this one broke me, and that is something I hadn't experienced before. I would ask my legs to sprint or pick up the pace and they would just laugh at me. It got so bad towards the end that I couldn't even see straight to count how many attacks were in the next interval, and my bike is 4' away from a 54" tv! Towards the end I just put my head down, closed my eyes and went as hard as I could. If you look at my power output from the ride you can tell exactly where I broke, the last two climbs. Oh well, tomorrow is another day!
Stage 4 - Nine Hammers (1 hour)
The Sufferfest's newest video (and one of my favorites) is an excellent example of how far they've come in terms of production values. Unfortunately I wasn't able to appreciate the video as my legs are just dead... that's the only way I can describe it, dead. That is, of course, until I start pedaling. Then they wake up and immediately start screaming at me. I knew I was in trouble during the first warm up mini hammer as I wasn't anywhere near my threshold and my legs were on fire after only 30 seconds. Deciding that discretion is the better part of stupidity I decided to drop my FTP down to 95% and hang on as best I could, though I did aim to over the target FTP as much as possible. I've heard this video features hammerhead sharks and many funny one liners from the gang at Sufferfest, but I cannot comment on that as my eyes were closed and I was hanging on for dear life, again.
I don't think I am recovering well as I was scheduled for a 30 minute run with a heart rate of no more than 135 this morning. I've been running in the 8:30 - 9:30 pace (albeit at a higher heart rate). To hit my target I had to slow down to 12:30 min/mile and felt like I was crawling. I'm looking forward to my rest week.
INTERMISSION
I am utterly exhausted today and not feeling well. I blame myself for not feeling well as I had delicious Thai food two days ago and I never do well with spicy food. Of course that doesn't stop me from eating it... I'm really not good at being an adult. As for the exhaustion, I think part of that is to be expected as I didn't really train for the Tour. My wife is kind enough to indulge me so I have been getting enough sleep (around 8 hours), I think 4 days of hard riding is simply taking it's toll. I also made the mistake of attempting to continue my weight loss during the tour and don't think I've been eating enough. In an attempt to rectify this mistake I had a nice breakfast at Tim Horton's and even splurged on a hash brown... my definition of splurging has certainly changed over the past few years!
Stage 5 - Angels (1 hour) 90%
Angels is a climbing stage featuring that a$#wipe Contador dancing up the stupid hills while I struggle to finish at 90%. I had a bike fit before this ride and decided to use it as a recovery stage, hence the 90%. Unfortunately the term recovery is a joke as my legs are simply dead weights hanging off my body at this point. It was interesting watching my HR hold steady at 5-15 BPM lower than what I expected given my perceived effort. I also noticed that my cadence was approximately 10 revolutions lower than normal during the recovery portions of the ride. I normally have no problem spinning at 90 - 95 RPM but today I struggled to hit 80-85. I'm learning quite a bit about fatigue and how my body responds to constant riding this week as I don't think I've ever ridden my bike more than 4 days in a row, and never this hard for this many days in a row. On the bright side, I did set some new PR's (5 sec, 10 sec, 20 sec, 30 sec, 1 min, and 2 min), but some of that can be credited to the higher baseline virtual power on the new bike.
One of the unique aspects of Sufferlandria is the 50 hour day (it accommodates our various time zones). This makes for a depressing visit to Facebook when I'm ready to start a stage only to read learn that other people are already two stages ahead of me!
Stage 6 - Local Hero (1 hour 25 minutes) 100%
Today was the Return of the Living Dead, aka, the previously dead weights that hung beneath my torso returned in the form of legs and allowed me to push through this stage at 100%. I was a little light on the recoveries in an attempt to try and force my heart rate down, but the hard work was done as prescribed. Also, Thor Husovd can suck it, I took that stage and even set a PR for 60 min wattage (271).
The first three 6 minute pyramids (1 min just below threshold, 1 minute above, 2 minutes well above, and then back down) weren't too bad, though I did struggle with finding the correct gearing on the first step to keep my FTP in the target range while also upping my cadence. The stage featured plenty of mental math/negotiations with myself, such as "Well the pyramids are 6 minutes, and the upcoming intervals are only 3, PLUS I get 2 minutes of rest in between and 2 is almost 3 so I get to rest for half the time!" Also, things like "Well, 8 intervals down, 4 to go... and the last 4 are only 2 minutes so that's not much more than one of the pyramids and the pyramids are 6 minutes, plus I get to rest so I only have a few minutes left!" It's amazing what your mind can try to justify when you are exhausted. I've also noticed that I'm starting to sport calluses on/near my butt... I'm pretty sure that's a good thing, right? It means I'm toughening up and growing accustomed to being in the saddle, right? Yeah, definitely a good thing.
Stage 7 - The Rookie (1 hour) 90%
The return of my legs was short lived as I struggled again today. On the bright side, The Rookie is probably my favorite video. It's another excellent example of how far the guys at Sufferfest have come and even has an engaging storyline. You are an unknown Sufferlandrian (sounds about right) who came out of nowhere to win the Tour of Sufferlandria (definitely in the realm of fantasy now) and have been offered the opportunity to ride with a pro team, Giant Shimano. I know, enjoying a cycling video for it's plot is kind of like saying you watch porn for the story or read Playboy for the articles, but in this case it's true! What more could you ask for really? You have the Oscar worth performances from team Giant Shimano, Marcel Kittel's sweet hair, and you even get to drop my favorite rider, Jensie! It was a good day, even if my ass was dragging.
Stage 8 - Revolver + Violator + Half is Easy (2 hours 25 minutes) 100%
This was the big stage... the one everyone had been whispering about since the tour was announced. 3 stages in a row, all of them sprint stages. It honored the youngest Knight of Sufferlandria, Dame Alissa Schubert, who was killed earlier this year when she was hit by a truck while cycling. RIP my lady.
Revolver is the first video I ever completed and was much more difficult this time around. Part of this newfound difficulty can be pinned on the fatigue from riding for so many days in a row, but I think a bigger reason for the increased suffering is my improved ability to ride the edge during the FTP test. 16 1 minute intervals WELL above threshold should be tough... if not, you're riding too easy. I rode this at 100% and was able to get reasonably close to my targets. It's not my favorite ride, but as sprint videos go, it's not too shabby.
One of my teammates posted that this stage wasn't as bad as expected... I say nay nay and call BS on that one, though I have to admit that he suckered me in and I was starting to believe him after the first few rounds of sprints on Violator. The initial sprints are short enough and have so much rest between intervals that you are lulled into a false sense of security. Eventually the rest decreases to the point where you barely have time to shift. Speaking of shifting... I missed a few intervals due to mechanical difficulties but eventually figured out some of the idiosyncrasies of Bean the Bike and was able to finish out the set. The last 5 minutes of this set are absolutely brutal.
Half is Easy... talk about false advertising! This is an incredibly difficult video featuring 2 sets of 10 minutes of alternating 15 seconds of rest and 15 seconds of flat out sprinting. I have learned I am not a sprinter. Again, by the time I had switched gears and Trainer Road has registered the increase power output I've lost two seconds. Sure, the obvious solution is to change gears and start sprinting early, but that wasn't going to happen. I did an okay job of hitting my power numbers here but you can see I struggled at times. Regardless, I'm happy with how the day went considering the mechanical issues and my lack of fast twitch muscle fibers.
Stage 9 - ISLAGIATT (2 hours) 90%
Blarghdy;alkvjelelhfsdlk
(this is John's wife, he's passed out in front of his laptop with his hands on the keyboard. I assume he's alive as his chest is still moving. He did not look well during this stage).
Okay, I'm back. This was far and away the most difficult thing I've ever done. It was more difficult than the 25k I completed a few years ago, more difficult than the half marathon last fall, and even more challenging than Memorial Day Murph. If you look at the ride chart it's without a doubt the ugliest ride to date in terms of hitting my power numbers. Despite that, it's probably the ride I'm most proud of as I feel I have honored the spirit of the tour. In hindsight you always feel like you could have done more, pushed a little harder here, increased your effort there... but after looking at today's ride profile and knowing how utterly exhausted I am, I'm confident in saying I have suffered as much as I was able to. I struggled out of the gate to even come close to some of the warmup power numbers and knew I was in trouble considering the length of this stage. I decided to ignore the targets and ride by feel, giving it everything I had, and damn the outcome. This quickly descended into a mental war. I tried to break everything down into small segments such as "Just 5 more minutes, finish 5 minutes", which quickly lead to "30 seconds... you can do anything for 30 seconds". I've always struggled with mental toughness when it comes to endurance events and, as my wife would tell you, am the king of justifying why I shouldn't do something. This stage was mentally and physically exhausting and became a constant struggle with that negative asshole sitting on my shoulder telling me to just stop pedaling and the suffering would be over. Instead of giving in I pushed on... beyond pain, beyond suffering, into a world of complete and total exhaustion. I no longer felt my legs, I simply willed them to turn with every stroke of the pedal. It was a long day that somehow went by in a flash and it is one of my proudest physical achievements to date.
Stage 5 - Angels (1 hour) 90%
Angels is a climbing stage featuring that a$#wipe Contador dancing up the stupid hills while I struggle to finish at 90%. I had a bike fit before this ride and decided to use it as a recovery stage, hence the 90%. Unfortunately the term recovery is a joke as my legs are simply dead weights hanging off my body at this point. It was interesting watching my HR hold steady at 5-15 BPM lower than what I expected given my perceived effort. I also noticed that my cadence was approximately 10 revolutions lower than normal during the recovery portions of the ride. I normally have no problem spinning at 90 - 95 RPM but today I struggled to hit 80-85. I'm learning quite a bit about fatigue and how my body responds to constant riding this week as I don't think I've ever ridden my bike more than 4 days in a row, and never this hard for this many days in a row. On the bright side, I did set some new PR's (5 sec, 10 sec, 20 sec, 30 sec, 1 min, and 2 min), but some of that can be credited to the higher baseline virtual power on the new bike.
One of the unique aspects of Sufferlandria is the 50 hour day (it accommodates our various time zones). This makes for a depressing visit to Facebook when I'm ready to start a stage only to read learn that other people are already two stages ahead of me!
Stage 6 - Local Hero (1 hour 25 minutes) 100%
Today was the Return of the Living Dead, aka, the previously dead weights that hung beneath my torso returned in the form of legs and allowed me to push through this stage at 100%. I was a little light on the recoveries in an attempt to try and force my heart rate down, but the hard work was done as prescribed. Also, Thor Husovd can suck it, I took that stage and even set a PR for 60 min wattage (271).
The first three 6 minute pyramids (1 min just below threshold, 1 minute above, 2 minutes well above, and then back down) weren't too bad, though I did struggle with finding the correct gearing on the first step to keep my FTP in the target range while also upping my cadence. The stage featured plenty of mental math/negotiations with myself, such as "Well the pyramids are 6 minutes, and the upcoming intervals are only 3, PLUS I get 2 minutes of rest in between and 2 is almost 3 so I get to rest for half the time!" Also, things like "Well, 8 intervals down, 4 to go... and the last 4 are only 2 minutes so that's not much more than one of the pyramids and the pyramids are 6 minutes, plus I get to rest so I only have a few minutes left!" It's amazing what your mind can try to justify when you are exhausted. I've also noticed that I'm starting to sport calluses on/near my butt... I'm pretty sure that's a good thing, right? It means I'm toughening up and growing accustomed to being in the saddle, right? Yeah, definitely a good thing.
Stage 7 - The Rookie (1 hour) 90%
The return of my legs was short lived as I struggled again today. On the bright side, The Rookie is probably my favorite video. It's another excellent example of how far the guys at Sufferfest have come and even has an engaging storyline. You are an unknown Sufferlandrian (sounds about right) who came out of nowhere to win the Tour of Sufferlandria (definitely in the realm of fantasy now) and have been offered the opportunity to ride with a pro team, Giant Shimano. I know, enjoying a cycling video for it's plot is kind of like saying you watch porn for the story or read Playboy for the articles, but in this case it's true! What more could you ask for really? You have the Oscar worth performances from team Giant Shimano, Marcel Kittel's sweet hair, and you even get to drop my favorite rider, Jensie! It was a good day, even if my ass was dragging.
Stage 8 - Revolver + Violator + Half is Easy (2 hours 25 minutes) 100%
This was the big stage... the one everyone had been whispering about since the tour was announced. 3 stages in a row, all of them sprint stages. It honored the youngest Knight of Sufferlandria, Dame Alissa Schubert, who was killed earlier this year when she was hit by a truck while cycling. RIP my lady.
Revolver is the first video I ever completed and was much more difficult this time around. Part of this newfound difficulty can be pinned on the fatigue from riding for so many days in a row, but I think a bigger reason for the increased suffering is my improved ability to ride the edge during the FTP test. 16 1 minute intervals WELL above threshold should be tough... if not, you're riding too easy. I rode this at 100% and was able to get reasonably close to my targets. It's not my favorite ride, but as sprint videos go, it's not too shabby.
One of my teammates posted that this stage wasn't as bad as expected... I say nay nay and call BS on that one, though I have to admit that he suckered me in and I was starting to believe him after the first few rounds of sprints on Violator. The initial sprints are short enough and have so much rest between intervals that you are lulled into a false sense of security. Eventually the rest decreases to the point where you barely have time to shift. Speaking of shifting... I missed a few intervals due to mechanical difficulties but eventually figured out some of the idiosyncrasies of Bean the Bike and was able to finish out the set. The last 5 minutes of this set are absolutely brutal.
Half is Easy... talk about false advertising! This is an incredibly difficult video featuring 2 sets of 10 minutes of alternating 15 seconds of rest and 15 seconds of flat out sprinting. I have learned I am not a sprinter. Again, by the time I had switched gears and Trainer Road has registered the increase power output I've lost two seconds. Sure, the obvious solution is to change gears and start sprinting early, but that wasn't going to happen. I did an okay job of hitting my power numbers here but you can see I struggled at times. Regardless, I'm happy with how the day went considering the mechanical issues and my lack of fast twitch muscle fibers.
Stage 9 - ISLAGIATT (2 hours) 90%
Blarghdy;alkvjelelhfsdlk
(this is John's wife, he's passed out in front of his laptop with his hands on the keyboard. I assume he's alive as his chest is still moving. He did not look well during this stage).
Okay, I'm back. This was far and away the most difficult thing I've ever done. It was more difficult than the 25k I completed a few years ago, more difficult than the half marathon last fall, and even more challenging than Memorial Day Murph. If you look at the ride chart it's without a doubt the ugliest ride to date in terms of hitting my power numbers. Despite that, it's probably the ride I'm most proud of as I feel I have honored the spirit of the tour. In hindsight you always feel like you could have done more, pushed a little harder here, increased your effort there... but after looking at today's ride profile and knowing how utterly exhausted I am, I'm confident in saying I have suffered as much as I was able to. I struggled out of the gate to even come close to some of the warmup power numbers and knew I was in trouble considering the length of this stage. I decided to ignore the targets and ride by feel, giving it everything I had, and damn the outcome. This quickly descended into a mental war. I tried to break everything down into small segments such as "Just 5 more minutes, finish 5 minutes", which quickly lead to "30 seconds... you can do anything for 30 seconds". I've always struggled with mental toughness when it comes to endurance events and, as my wife would tell you, am the king of justifying why I shouldn't do something. This stage was mentally and physically exhausting and became a constant struggle with that negative asshole sitting on my shoulder telling me to just stop pedaling and the suffering would be over. Instead of giving in I pushed on... beyond pain, beyond suffering, into a world of complete and total exhaustion. I no longer felt my legs, I simply willed them to turn with every stroke of the pedal. It was a long day that somehow went by in a flash and it is one of my proudest physical achievements to date.
